Addressing Mental Health as Kids Return to School: A Guide for Parents

As our kiddos head back to school, it's crucial for us parents to have open conversations about mental health. The transition can bring excitement, but also anxiety and stress. Here are some tips for parents to effectively discuss mental health with their children:

1. Create a supportive environment

Establish an atmosphere where your child feels comfortable sharing their thoughts and feelings. Make it clear that you're always available to listen without judgment. This can be difficult because children and teens often express some pretty illogical ideas. Remember it is not your job to correct those, but instead, listen to them. 

2. Start the conversation early

Don't wait for signs of distress. Initiate discussions about mental health before school starts to normalize the topic. You can do this by dropping emotion focused words into regular conversations or discussing mental health topics with others around you more regularly. 

3. Use age-appropriate language

Tailor your approach based on your child's age and maturity level. Younger children may benefit from simple explanations, while teenagers can handle more nuanced discussions. Use words they typically use in their everyday language at home or with friends. 

4. Share your own experiences

If appropriate, talk about times when you've felt anxious or stressed. This helps children understand that these feelings are normal and manageable. Discuss what that experience was like for you and how you handled it. Share times when you failed and when you succeeded in managing your mental health. 

5. Teach emotional vocabulary

Help your child identify and express their emotions accurately. This skill is crucial for managing mental health. When children are young, they often do not have the words to go along with what they are feeling. You can observe them, and suggest an emotion word: “You seem mad.” For older children, they may know the words associated with what they are feeling, but they may not be able to properly express or voice their feelings. Try open ended prompts to help get them started “That would really upset me. How do you feel about it?”

6. Discuss coping strategies

Explore healthy ways to deal with stress and anxiety together. This might include deep breathing exercises, journaling, or physical activities. This is another opportunity to share how you manage stress. Be sure that what you share is actually what you model in front of them. Kids can smell bullshit from miles away. 

7. Encourage routine and structure

Highlight the importance of maintaining a balanced routine, including regular sleep, healthy eating, and exercise. Offering healthy food choices at home, creating a bedtime routine (this should be done for both younger and older children), and participating in family activities that include being active (take a walk together, playing a sport.) Remember, you are also modeling behavior for them so practice what you preach here. 

8. Address social media use

Discuss the impact of social media on mental health and set guidelines for healthy usage. Merely saying, “social media is bad,” will get you nowhere. Do some education on how social media affects mental health negatively. Explain how cultivating a positive social media environment can benefit them. 

9. Know the warning signs

Familiarize yourself with signs of mental health issues in children and adolescents. These may include changes in sleep patterns, appetite, mood, or social behavior. Unfortunately, many of those are also signs of growth and development as well. That is why it is important to have continual conversations about their mental health. The same way you would check in to ask “How is school?” “How are your grades?” “Are you feeling sick today?” You can ask “How’s your mental health lately?” “How are you doing emotionally?” Yes, you can even do this with young children, just be sure to use their vocabulary. 

10. Seek professional help when needed

Emphasize that it's okay to ask for help and discuss the role of mental health professionals if additional support is required. Therapy is helpful when you are in crisis, but also incredibly beneficial when you are not in crisis. Express how therapy is much like going to the gym or getting a physical, it is a means to maintain health. 

By fostering open communication about mental health, parents can help their children navigate the challenges of returning to school with resilience and confidence.